Friday, April 30, 2010
dear i duno wat am i doing.. my best fren actually say b4, its best to brk cuz i will not be happy. yr fren oso pointed out all problems from him
hes nt romantic,boring,nt caring,nt sensitive,guy who thinks of himself
last bt nt least
she cnt stand DA NEN REN
u know, last time when he jio me, all these shortcomings all not visible de. that time he did keep saying he is boring type of person. but when i know him de time he's different. now he tell me all along he's like tat, y he no show all these from the start? can give me more considerations. now i feel like ~ he love me but no wan put in efforts OR i love him more than he love me. i believe if got love u sure want to keep communicate with him/her and wont keep say sian sian sian.. indeed i always try to communicate with him.. but duno y gradually at certain point i will start to hide things frm him.. like wat i eat, i overslp so no go sch, i audi-ing, i very late den go bath, i slp very late, or smtimes i no eat oso, those bad habits even though they r bad but i would still tell u right? i know u will say me smth but i still will tell u hor? i nv tell him lo.. cuz i know he will nag me. but i very scared when he nag me lo, cuz the things he said will sound very harsh and fierce. he not nagging me as bf, he nagging me as my papa, also kinda remind me of my dajie.. so many many things i no dare tell him. now he really dun care bout me le bah. "wats mine will be mine" he said... so if i brk 2nd time he will let go easily right? he also says he's delusioned.. means i cheated him right? actually i duno whether i got commit properly to this r/s anot. sometimes when i see him so cold then i buay song oso cold wif him. b4 i know u, i tot guys r lidat so i suan le. i told myself must be as cheerful as i can in front of him. to make him happy and to make me happy. but i feel kinda xinku le.. when i emo bout my fyp he only orh orh.. sayang or jy for me oso dun hav.. last time wed after work he no pick me up say wan slp, oso no sorry. though dun really need sorry, at least should give me some nice talkingg right? all the feelings for wanting to break and all the reasons all coming back to me.. u wan me cheerful 24/7? please luh i no need be emo at times? i cant fa pi qi? i cant fan nao? u wan me be understanding woman and mature to this extent? WOMAN!! i jus realise im only a YOUNG girl, student, youth, teenager still.. why i dun feel his love at all? i only can feel his love through other people tell me. why he cant shower love to me directly? does he ever think wat do i need now? when i emo, what do i need? when i not happy, what do i need? i complain smth, he orh orh nth to say, make me feel more sian, make me feel like i rather go talk to wall. u know what his best reply? to me his best reply is " haha" or "lol".. pianggg... brb i go bang wall v_v
iKillBiscuit
8:57 PM
